(If you came searching for ALO's Barbeque, click the word. It's a good song, that's why I borrowed it's lyrics.)

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Halloween gender benders

When a new family joins our list-serve through TYFA, they usually start by introducing their stories. Some lurk for months reading others' postings, unsure of themselves, their situations, their children. Eventually there will be a story. Inevitably the story will involve Halloween, especially the families with trans-identified girls. Their stories will differ from those of your other children.

National Geographic, Part 3 Sex, Lies, And Gender

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Dress for success

Just around the corner in every woman's mind - is a lovely dress, a wonderful suit, or entire costume which will make an enchanting new creature of her. 
~Wilhela Cushman
As early as the fall, three years ago (we adopted midsummer), L was wearing dress-ups as often as he could (also see Mother May I). Sure, sometimes it would be a pirate or a magician, and we would take heart. More often than not, though, it was a princess or fashion model. We kept hoping he'd grow out of it, that living in the women's dorm in the orphanage had swayed him, and that living with three brother s would swing the pendulum in the other direction.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Early indications (revised)

(Note: although we fully accept our daughter is a girl, I've use the male pronoun to refer to her during the phase we all thought she was a boy.) In the first picture we saw of the boy we decided to adopt there he stood wearing a red shirt holding a pink stuffed animal. "It's a meepit!" the twin boys shouted. They were in a phase where they loved their small pink creatures that looked like guinea pigs on two legs. Wasn't it cool their soon to be brother liked them too? I knew that when I lived in China, boys didn't wear red, but maybe things had changed.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Janet's first day at school

Always provide for a distraction when your child appears in public for the first time as his or her affirmed gender. I learned this and other things on Janet’s first day of school as a girl.

World stats

I just discovered that I have had several page hits from Australia, Canada, Japan, the Netherlands, Russia, France, Austria, the UK and India. Most of my hits have come from the TransYouth Family Allies website. Thanks, TYFA! And welcome world! G'day, mate! Welkom! 歓迎  Добро пожаловать! Bienvenue! Willkommen!欢迎中国朋友们!Please send a comment and mark "private" if you need help or have questions.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

On the verge

Janet and I have been waiting 19 months for the results from a bone-age study which was supposed to determine onset of puberty. We both have our reasons. Janet can't wait for puberty because she wants something up top. Plain and simple. I don't think she even knows she'll get hips, too, and some extra padding. Being a girl to her means going to Kohl's and picking out a bra and most of all, needing it. When I think of her classmates, almost all of them have started developing or at least fatty tissue masquerading their development.

Friday, October 15, 2010

What I didn't know I did

Since my bunion surgery and my banishment to the couch I have come up with a myriad list of things I didn't know I did on a regular basis. I'm no clean freak, in fact I'm kind of messy. But still...
  1. Close the windows in the morning if the heat comes on.
  2. Open up curtains and shades to let sun in. 
  3. Shut the curtains at night so the neighbors can't see everything we're doing
  4. Check guinea pig cage for dry food and water. Feed her lettuce.
  5. Unload the dishwasher if the twins haven't done their chore and reload it so the dirty dishes don't pile up.
  6. Shut closet doors and push in dining room chairs and piano benches for "neat effect."
  7. Empty clothing from dryer directly on couch while still warm so it can be folded and doesn't wrinkle.
  8. Sort it, fold it, and if necessary put away laundry, or direct children to do so (glowering).
  9. Clean kitchen and bathroom sinks after use.
  10. Clean shower stall and bath.
  11. Spread out shower curtains so they dry and rehang bunched up wet towels.
  12. Hang up wet shower mats and replace with dry.
  13. Wipe down counter tops and table. 
  14. Remove bread from freezer when other loaf starts running out. Add bread to shopping list.
  15. Put away condiments in fridge door.
  16. Add anything that's running out to shopping list.
  17. Shop.
  18. Water plants.
  19. Fold throws on couches.
  20. Cook dinner.
  21. Let cats in and out 15 times a day.